JOKES!

Why are computers always hungry? Because they take mega-bytes! GET IT!? MEGA-BYTES!?

What kind of tree grows in your hand? A palm tree! GET IT! PALM TREE!?

Why did the banana go to the psychiatrist? Because he had a split personality! GET IT!? SPLIT personality!?

What do you call a crazy train? A locomotive! Get it? LOCO-motive!? Hahahahaha! (that pun had Spanish in it) Hahahaha!

Did you hear about the melon whose whole left side was cut off? He's ALL RIGHT now - Get it? ALL RIGHT???

I HATE vampires! They are a pain in the neck! HAHAHAHHA

What do you call dead cows that come back to life? Zombeef! HAHAHA! Get it?! Zom-BEEF??

Did you know I used to be addicted to soap? I'm clean now. HAHAHAHA! Get it?! CLEAN?!


Good: Your wife doesn't talk to you.
Bad: She wants divorce.
Very bad: She is a lawyer.